Unemployment – I have recently joined the ranks of the unemployed, having been unexpectedly and unceremoniously fired from my job. And it was surreal. For years, I had been given decent raises, bonuses for good performance, and much praise. I was often told what a great job I was doing, and how much I was appreciated and needed.
Then BAM – one afternoon I was simply told, “We have decided to let you go.” And so I had to pick up the pieces of my shattered pride, pack up all my personal pictures and knick-knacks, and turn in my keys.
Losing my job was very disorienting. As much as I was stressed, exhausted, and hated it, I was so used to my routine. I knew when I had to get up, where I had to be, and what I had to do each day.
Now, suddenly, I’ve lost that. I’m never sure what day it is anymore. I often feel like I’m late for work or should be at work. I wonder what I’m doing home with nothing to do. I feel like I’m doing something wrong, that I should be somewhere or doing something “productive.” I have no structure, and I feel like I’m floundering.
But I am free. My time is open, and I can move at my own pace, which is slow. I no longer have to wake up early or drive in rush hour. I don’t have to get a million things done on the weekend.
I can savor the stillness and calmness. I can luxuriate in the peace and silence of each moment. I can gaze at the sunlight twinkling and sparkling in the pool, and let my eyes unfocus and not think. I can aimlessly watch the leaves dancing in the breeze and breathe deeply of the fresh air.
I can now take the time to enjoy my life, rather than rushing through it. I can explore new talents, interests, and ideas. I can rediscover who I am. I can uncover and unleash inner passion and potential.
I have started playing the piano again. I am reading again, and I have a stack of books I can’t wait to read. I am writing for the first time – I have started a blog and am working on my first book. I can do anything I want – the whole world is open.
Yes, I have lost my income, but I have gained so much more than that.
I am now free.
Copyright © 2014 Lynn Miclea. All Rights Reserved.