Approval

J.file9041272379125[1]Approval – For many years I have looked for approval from others – from parents, teachers, friends, and bosses. Hoping for an “A” in school, and a “Great Job!” at work. When I didn’t get that, it felt like I was not good enough.  And I kept looking for others for that validation that I was worthwhile and valuable.

But what I also found was that when I did get it, it somehow didn’t touch me, or it didn’t feel like enough.  It often didn’t feel valid or real, and I didn’t believe it. I craved it and wanted it, but it somehow just didn’t reach me.

theresa_799_pe[1]I’ve now come to realize that the approval that I really need, the only one that really matters, is my own. Getting it on the outside is meaningless when it’s missing on the inside. And when I have it on the inside, the outside approval is then not even necessary.

We spend so much energy seeking approval from outside ourselves, it’s time we look where it really matters – inside. We need to always love and accept ourselves first.

And that’s when we discover that we are and always have been worthwhile and valuable, just the way we are.  And the confirmation is the peace and joy that come from our self-love.

I approve this message.

Copyright © 2014 Lynn Miclea. All Rights Reserved.

 

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About Lynn Miclea

LYNN MICLEA grew up in New York and moved to California while in her twenties. A certified hypnotherapist, Reiki master practitioner, and musician, with a bachelor’s degree in psychology, she has held many jobs but has always loved reading and writing stories. After retiring, Lynn further pursued her passion for writing, and she is now a successful author with many books published and more on the way. She has published many fiction, nonfiction, and children’s books, and she hopes that through her writing, she can help empower others and add more joy and love to the world. She asks everyone to be kind to each other as we all share this journey through life together. Lynn currently lives in the Los Angeles area with her husband and two dogs. Please visit her website at www.lynnmiclea.com.
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13 Responses to Approval

  1. Great post Lynn; sooo pertinent and spot on!

  2. greyzoned/angelsbark says:

    Easier said than done. How well I know! Thanks for the reminder. Great post Lynn.

  3. Eileen says:

    You could be describing me! I realised a few years ago that I was constantly looking for the approval of others and had one of those ‘light bulb’ moments when I realised that there was a direct link from this attitude to the amount of stress in my life. Trying to change!

    Linking from the A to Z Challenge.
    Eileen @ In My Playroom

    • Lynn Miclea says:

      Thank you for your comment, Eileen, I appreciate that! Having those “light bulb” moments and seeing what you are doing is the most important step. Good for you! 🙂

  4. So true! Life is much easier and more enjoyable once we no longer seek other people’s approval! I had to come to the point of not caring what anyone thinks. For me, I still remember the moment when I made that decision. So glad I did!

  5. Great post. It’s so hard to stop seeking approval.

    anna
    Deeply Shallow

    • Lynn Miclea says:

      Anna, thank you for your comment. Yes, I do understand. As much as I am getting stronger and don’t want approval from outside, I do still seek it. It is an ongoing process, but I think the more we try, the easier it gets, and the stronger we get. Keep working at it! ❤

  6. Thanks for following Lynn. What is “tapping”? Sorry to be so ignorant.

    • Lynn Miclea says:

      Hi Shirley, thank you for your question. No problem – not everyone knows about tapping. Tapping is also known as EFT (emotional freedom technique), and it is a process of tapping on the endpoints of the energy pathways, or meridians, in our bodies. Energy flows along these meridians, and when we have issues of any kind – fears, phobias, anxiety, grief, pain, etc… the energy gets stuck or blocked along these pathways. Tapping releases the blockages or interruptions in the flow of energy, thereby releasing the attached emotional issue. I have used it for all kinds of issues – it is fast and effective and has amazing results. Hope this helps clarify it! 🙂

  7. cardamone5 says:

    Wow! You’re a hypnotherapist? I’ve always considered myself immune to being hypnotized. How do you hypnotize someone (my ignorant self is picturing a watch swinging back and forth in front of someone’s closing eyes. I’m sure that’s not right.)

    Thanks for following my blog. I’m a follower now too.

    Best regards,
    Elizabeth

    • Lynn Miclea says:

      Hi Elizabeth – yes, I’m a hypnotherapist. Everyone can be hypnotized, even those who are skeptical. We don’t use a watch – that is for TV and the movies. There are various inductions we can use which fatigue and overload the mind (clasping hands, staring at a spot on the ceiling, etc.), and then we bring you into a comfortable, easy state of deep relaxation, similar to a meditative state. It’s actually a natural state that we go in and out of many times during the day, and suggestions can bypass the critical aspect of our minds and get into our subconscious. It’s very powerful. We also cannot make you do anything you don’t want to do or that is against your beliefs, and you are always in control and come out of it if you wish. However, it is a very comfortable, relaxed state, and we put in suggestions that we have agreed on, changes you want to make. 🙂

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